A Christmas Miracle

I forgot my Thankful Thursday this week... maybe that's why I find myself more bitter than usual this weekend.  Or the fact that I was on call yesterday and didn't get much sleep... either way, god damn, every woman of child bearing age in Cincinnati is pregnant, except for me. 

I went to the grocery store today- bad plan at 5pm on a Sunday.  Near the end of my trip (which was only 20 minutes long) I regretted not having counted how many bulging bellies I saw, bellies who were pushing those car carts with another child inside or who were chasing after their other child who was screaming and running away because they didn't get a sample.  And for once I was that person who was highly annoyed by the children who were acting ridiculous. Because come on- five million bellies, screaming children and a crowded freaking grocery store, we all have our breaking points. 

Then I just made the mistake of going on facebook and discovering a colleague (who I am traveling & staying in a hotel room with in December) and another one of my high school friends are both pregnant.  Out of the group of 9 of us- 7 are married, 2 have children, and 2 are currently with child.  I am starting to think I will be the last married one to have a kid.  Luckily one of them right now does not want to have children (like ever)- so hopefully I can count on her to not change her mind or at least wait a couple years until science is able to knock me up.

It's just hard- there are so many things I feel that we are excluded from or not invited to because they are centered around kids.  Most of our friends now have children and it's not uncommon for things like "Well we're planning a trip to go to Hilton Head w/ these other couples but I don't know if you guys would be interested since you don't have kids."

For a million reasons today I am just grouchy.  No excuses I fess up to it.

Despite all this, an amazing thing happened tonight.  I went to my parents for dinner without the hubby.  He is on call today and thus was at the hospital.  Our schedules always line up so well.  I was kind of dreading it because my mom always makes incessant comments about when we are going to have children, when she can be our nanny ect ect.  Usually the hubby is there to say something fantastic like, "Maybe when your daughter stops swallowing."  Yes, he has said that out loud to my parents on more than one occasion. It shuts down the conversation pretty quick which is what he's after.  But tonight- my mother she did not say one thing.  I think this is the first time she has kept her mouth shut in probably >6 months.  It was a Christmas miracle.

I don't know what inspired it but I'll take it.